Top Ten Reasons I Love Being Divorced
Top ten reasons why I don’t mind being divorced:
- Don’t have to ask permission for ANYTHING!
- I love my kids, but every other weekend is kid-free (as long as you didn’t divorce a dead-beat). I need my me-time.
- Dating do-over. You know exactly what drove you crazy about your ex (chewed on fingernails, couldn’t fix a damn thing, too many extracurricular activities [THAT’S AN UNDERSTATEMENT]), the list goes on and on, and you ask the right questions early on to avoid having the crap bugged out of you. Again.
- Booty calls. They have their place! Don’t knock ’em.
- Only have to be Santa every other year. It’s hard work and I’m busy!
- Get the chance to pick a better lover! (see number 4)
- No more ESPN or sports talk radio. This one makes me really happy.
- If something needs to be done I do it. No longer do I have to wish he would do it because he wouldn’t, which would make me mad because it pointed out what a lazy ass I had married.
- I don’t need a man. Occasionally I want a man (see number 6, then number 4), but I don’t need a man.
- Girlz trips! Duh!
Over and out!
Johnell, the Jo in Joan